SafeScroll
📚 Ages 6–12 · Children
🇬🇧 UK Guidance
The 5 App Safety Questions
to Ask Your Child
Five simple, non-threatening conversation starters that open up honest dialogue about what your child does online — without triggering defensiveness or an argument.
ICO Children's Code
NSPCC Guidance
Internet Matters UK
How to use this sheet: These are not interrogation questions — they are curiosity questions. The goal is to keep the door open, not to catch your child doing something wrong. Use them casually, ideally during a shared activity, not while they are holding a device. You do not need to ask all five at once.
The 5 questions — with follow-ups and what not to say
"Tell me what you actually do on there — I've never used it properly."
Why it works
Positions you as curious, not suspicious. Children are more likely to share when they feel like they're teaching you something.
Natural follow-up
"Who else do you know that uses it?" or "What kind of stuff do you usually watch/see on there?"
⚠ What not to say
"You're not on that app, are you?" — leads to defensive denial rather than conversation.
"It can be anything — something you saw, a message, an advert, anything at all."
Why it works
"Weird or uncomfortable" is less loaded than "bad" or "inappropriate." It gives children a low-stakes way to surface real concerns.
Natural follow-up
"What did you do when that happened?" — this tells you how they currently respond to risk, without judgement.
⚠ What not to say
"You should have told me straight away" — this closes future disclosures. Instead: "I'm really glad you felt you could tell me."
"I'm not saying that's bad — I just want to understand who's in your world online."
Why it works
Opens up gaming friends, Discord contacts, or fan communities in a non-accusatory way. Most online contact is benign — treat it as normal.
Natural follow-up
"What do you know about them — like where they're from?" — builds awareness without panic.
⚠ What not to say
"You could be talking to a paedophile" — immediate panic shuts the conversation down and makes them feel stupid rather than safe.
"I'm curious — what's your instinct? There's no right answer."
Why it works
Tells you their current coping strategy. If they say "nothing" or "ignore it," you now have a natural reason to discuss alternatives.
Natural follow-up
"What if it was something really serious — would you tell someone?" — opens up the safeguarding conversation naturally.
⚠ What not to say
"You'd better come to me immediately" — this sets an unrealistic expectation they may feel unable to meet.
"You won't get in trouble — I just want to understand what's actually out there."
Why it works
Invites voluntary disclosure. Often produces the most honest answers — children frequently want to share things but haven't been given permission to.
Natural follow-up
"Thanks for telling me that — I'm not going to overreact, I promise." Then don't overreact.
⚠ What not to say
Any response that involves immediate punishment, taking devices away, or raised voices — if you react this way, it will be the last disclosure.
The mindset shift that makes all five questions work
The quality of what your child tells you depends almost entirely on how you respond to what they've told you before. The goal of these questions is to become the person they come to — not the person they hide things from.
❌ Approaches that close conversations
Reacting with fear, anger, or immediate consequences
Asking questions while they're in the middle of using a device
Starting with rules and consequences
Treating everything as a problem to be solved immediately
✅ Approaches that keep conversations open
Staying curious and non-judgemental, even if surprised
Asking during a shared activity, not a formal sit-down
Saying "thanks for telling me" — and meaning it
Letting the conversation be unfinished — it can continue another day
Reading what their answers tell you
✅ Reassuring signs
They answer without long pauses or obvious discomfort
They name specific friends you already know
They say they'd come to you or another trusted adult
They share something voluntarily at the end
They seem relaxed and curious about your reactions
⚠ Worth exploring further
Strong resistance to any of the questions
Vague answers about who they talk to online
"I'd handle it myself" — explore what that means
Switching screens or devices when you enter the room
Changes in mood after device use — especially withdrawal
Want a complete framework for this age group?
Our Children's Digital Wellness Guide (ages 6–12) includes conversation scripts, boundary frameworks, and a week-by-week plan for building lasting online safety habits at home.
Browse the guides →